Tuesday, April 17, 2007

Postcard From Holland #2

Dear All,

Am staying with Mr Smith's relatives at the moment. They will not stop talking.

My font of small-talk hath runneth dry.

Am fashioning a rope made from bedsheets, and will attempt to make a run for the Belgium border tonight.

Help.

Mrs Smith

7 comments:

Martha Craig said...

Christ, don't forget the duty free.

Cactus Kate said...

You poor dear.

You did though varry da Dutchie.

Unlucky.

unPC lesbian said...

I hope the sheets are the waterproof kind, remember you are in the lowlands.

And ditto Martha, don't forget the duty free......hmmm I wonder if switching on the Ipod very loud while with relatives counts as duty free?

Lawrence of Otago said...

I reccommend a counter offensive.

Pretend to be learning their language, feigning much enthusism, ask them ALL THE TIME, how do you say "cup of tea" in dutch etc.

Then of course you ignore their words and mispronounce everything and repeat the question 12 minutes later.

They will soon lean to leave the room on your arrival.

SG

unPC lesbian said...

ha ha, southern gent. i was just going to make another suggestion. If you're still in Amsterdam go visist one for the "cafes", then dream dream nothing matters anymore.....

Anonymous said...

Another option if you are in Amsterdam is to move out and take one of those rooms one sees those ladies in.

I am sure you will have a nice matching bra and knickers to wear -in fact if my memory is right they don't need to be matching.

Barnsley Bill said...

If you are contemplating doing a flit to Belgium they must be awful. Belgium is more dire than Wellington.