Friday, May 25, 2007

Diagnosis

Ms W is doing a course in psychology. I do despair for the state of our tertiary institutions, if they allow dim-wits such as herself through their doors. Anyway, she is driving everyone quite mad with her rudimentary grasp of the textbook. She has diagnosed us all with the most bizarre and rare afflictions (I hate to think which disorder she has randomly assigned to me. When asked who did I most admire, I said 'Attila the Hun,' and Ms W pursed her lips in an annoying, "I knew it" sort of way).

"He has Asperger's Syndrome," she said.
"Who?" I asked (I had stopped listening some time ago. For an aspiring psychologist, her skills of observation are astoundingly weak).
"My husband," she said, exasperated.
"Asperger’s Syndrome? Why on earth would you think that?"
"He has the classic symptoms... it's impossible to engage him in conversation. And he never looks at me when I talk to him. It's like talking to a wall. I get no response at all."
She leaned forward earnestly.
"I used to think he was just ignoring me."

I laughed all the way home.

4 comments:

Ms Klake said...

I love the whole amateur diagnosis thing. I have one friend who claims Aspergers, because people don't like him much and his social skills suck. He seems to prefer his self-diagnosis to the reality that he's just a prize prick with very little charisma.

P.S. If this woman has a copy of the DSM IV forcefully remove it from her possession immediately.

Oswald Bastable said...

I have never yet met anyone in psychology that didn't have more issues than a labour party conference!

unPC lesbian said...

As I employ many students and have done for years I have one hard and fast rule, NEVER employ psyche students as they are the most fukked up people on the planet. I have been proven right many times over.

Aspergers, I love the way it's now the new blanket diagnosis to cover many nasty personality traits. Agree with you Krimson that's it's just the current fashionable way to disguise that someone really is just a nasty boring little sod with no manners or concern for others around them.

Drewcifer said...

I have an acquaintance (even acquaintance is pushing the bounds of reality) who is a psych student, even works in some kind of institution. This would be the same person who was professionally(*AHEM*) diagnosed as being manic depressive, with an addictive personality. Has extreme alcohol issues, Yes Mrs Smith, I know... but when one is throwing up ones entire life at a party, having consumed two bottles of cheap 'fizz' and a handful of valium, I consider it a "problem".

And he has the gall to pronounce judgement, with nose held aloft, on those in his "care"...

I'd like to say they become as they company they keep, but in this case, it's rather poor company to start with.