Wednesday, March 28, 2007

Crush

A friend's son – barely out of his teens - admitted he has a crush on me.

It was evening, and we were sitting outside, in the garden. The cicadas were maddeningly loud, and we could hardly hear ourselves talk, but as it is doubtful that either of us was saying anything of interest, it hardly mattered. My friend went inside to answer the phone, and I was alone with her son. He talked for a while about university, which bored me, and I started watching him, wondering if he was gay. A gross stereotype, I suppose, but there seemed a certain theatricality to the way he spoke, the dramatic expressions he pulled to emphasise a point, and how he waved his hands around like an Italian opera singer, so that I thought his gayness guaranteed.

"I have a crush on you," he said, then continued talking about his classes.
I opened and closed my mouth a few times in what was probably a very fair rendition of a goldfish. Thanks to the shouting cicadas and my lack of attention, I couldn’t be sure I had heard him correctly.
"I'm sorry – what did you say?"
He looked abashed. "Oh, never mind," he said, getting up, and disappeared into the darkening garden.

I was extremely flattered. I told Mrs S. "He was in an accident a few years ago," she said. "He had brain injuries." I thought this rather unkind to me, as the assumption was that only the mentally deficient would find me appealing.

I saw him again in the city yesterday. "Hello Deborah!" he called out, cheerily.
My name is not Deborah. I pointed this out to him. "Oh, I know," he said, with a secret smile.

I don’t feel flattered anymore.

11 comments:

llew said...

What a coincidence, for some reason I was thinking of the old movie Class http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0085346/ only yesterday.

unPC lesbian said...

Oh well thats done it now! Mrs Smith you are now etched in my mind as Jacqueline Bisset swoon, triple triple swoon....

Cactus Kate said...

Is he hot?

Southern Gent said...

Take the compliment, perhaps it spilled in one of his more lucid moments.

I suspect he did not advance the topic out of fear. Equally the "Deborah" comment tossed into the mix to hide an embarassment.

I am sure he would feel ten foot tall if you could return a sincere compliment.

Oh shucks, just give him a ride if that is your fancy.

SG

mojo said...

He'll do well at university, that boy.

Anonymous said...

He clearly appreciates your (cl)ass . Just ask if he likes pinapple first.

Drewcifer said...

As I see it there are two options here... you *could* be charitable, and assume that his compliment was uttered in a moment of clarity and lucidity, or you could could thrust a well turned heel into the back of his knee next time you see him standing at the top of a set of stairs. After all, who would question him falling down a flight (or two) of stairs when he's clearly not in posession of *all* of his faculties..

unPC lesbian said...

Oh he sounds gorgeous. Ask him what he's studying (but this time listen). The Deborah reference will prolly be hooked up in there somewhere, and will be deep and meaningful to him. Sounds like an english major to me. Should we be calling you Mrs Robinson now?

Mrs Smith said...

1.Everyone likes pineapple.
2.Think I would prefer to be Jacqueline Bisset than Mrs Robinson.
3.This version of 'Class' is going to remain very much G-rated. Absolutely no nudity or sex scenes.
4. Too young to be hot. Too old to be cute.

d-man said...

You should totally hit that.

:D

Anonymous said...

He sounds completely gay to me. Maybe his crush is more about what you wear ...